15. Easing discomfort, or at least trying to.

This post is mainly aimed at pregnant mums who are experiencing pain and discomfort. I see loads of posts from multiples mums with similar issues to me and lots of ideas and suggestions to help with the aches and pains. 

Morning sickness and nausea

To start with, I feel like i cant skip past morning sickness. I only had a few days of nausea with Jack, but the nausea was so extreme with the triplets, I really struggled to eat and sleep. I know some people who were really physically ill unfortunately. At times, I desperately wanted to be physically sick just to ease the nausea, but it never happened. For me, it eased around 16 weeks with the triplets and it was like a breath if fresh air! If it is really bad, doctors and midwives may offer an anti sickness medicine. 

One of the most common tips are to eat ginger. This didn't work for me but I tried baking ginger biscuits and cakes, and tried sweets and tea. Worth trying all options. For me, fizzy water was my best option and I drank gallons of the stuff. I also drank peppermint tea with Jack, and that seemed to help a little. Not with the triplets though. 

With the nausea, I really struggled to eat anything. I forced food down and hated every second. I was so paranoid about getting the nutrients into my body that the little heartbeats needed. I would advise not to push yourself. Someone pointed out to me that they will take what they need from me and that the last thing they need is for me to make myself poorly. As long as I was eating something, they would benefit, as would I. 

I found a few things that I could happily eat, so I simply grazed on these all day and attempted small meals. My poor husband tried cooking all my favourite meals which I basically pushed around the plate and nibbled at. I felt like a brat, but eating when you feel so sick is just horrible. 

One thing that I quickly figured out when I was pregnant with Jack, if I got hungry, I felt sick. I kept snacks with me at all times and made sure I had a few bites of something before the hunger kicked in and made me feel ill. Some people keep crackers by the bed for a midnight snack. I regularly got up in the night for cheese and crackers, cereal or toast. Anything to keep the nausea at bay and get that precious sleep. 

Smells

Stay away from smells that turn your stomach. Easier said than done, but as soon as you know what sends you west, do your best to avoid it, because it hits like a ton of bricks. For me, it was bleach, raw onions and stale alcohol. Not pleasant smells on a normal day. For my friend, it was a fabric softener she had been using previously. Her sister had come to watch the kids so she could have a rest upstairs, and decided to help out by putting the laundry on for her. She came downstairs to a nice fresh load all hung out and drying. Instead of the "oh gosh, how kind, thank you very much for doing our laundry", she got "oh my god, you have to wash it again" followed by a rapid exit to the bathroom! 

I've also heard that things like raw chicken can set people off. I hate the smell of raw meat when I'm not pregnant so I totally understand that one! But not a trigger for me fortunately. 

I have no tips or tricks for these, except, avoid them! We bought a variety of cleaning products without the bleach smell, none of which were nice, but at least the bleach smell wasn't there.

Discomfort

In bed

We have all seen the piles of pillows that pregnant women surround themselves with when their belly is expanding. It's no exaggeration. It is so difficult to find a comfortable position and it's all about experimenting. And annoyingly, as you grow, you need to continually try different combinations and positions. I find at the moment I need a pillow which tucks under my belly a bit, and I can rest my top leg on to keep me pulled forward a bit. I also have a pillow behind my back to prevent me from rolling onto my back. I do have a decent pregnancy pillow, but at the moment I'm finding it quite restrictive. Because I am suffering with rib pain I need to turn over quite a lot, so the two pillows are easier to maneuver around myself than the pregnancy pillow.

During my third trimester with Jack, my pelvis was very sore too, so I doubled over a mattress topper to give extra padding to try and take the weight off my hips as much as possible. This as well as multiple pillows of course. I also found that if I lay two squashy pillows side by side and tried to position myself so my hip lay right in the middle, I was in a big soft cushioned bed which allowed me to have enough comfort to fall asleep. It doesn't always work, but it's all worth a try. 

Night time need to pee

It's SO annoying, especially when you have to navigate your way out of your pillow fort you spent so long perfecting just a few hours before. I have started going for a wee, brushing teeth etc, then getting ready for bed and reading for a bit to get me nice and relaxed and tired. I then get up for a final wee before the final attempt to get to sleep. It delays the time of wakeup by a surprising amount. I even had a few weeks of sleeping all the way through! I'm getting up again, but only once a night at the moment. I unfortunately get a diabolical thirst within seconds of having a wee. So I quickly top myself back up. 

Rib pain

From my experience, very few people I know have suffered from rib pain at all. I really struggled with Jack in my final weeks, and it came back around 19 weeks this time and hasn't left me alone. It can be excruciating and seemingly had no cure. 

But! I have found ways to ease it, for now at least! And I have realised what is currently making it worse and it's all about finding a happy medium of movement and rest. And the right kind of rest. 

During my pregnancy with Jack, I got a muscle knot in my back, so visited a pregnancy physio for some much needed help. I told her about my rib pain and she told me that a woman's rib cage can expand up to 12% during pregnancy. TWELVE PERCENT!! That explains the discomfort! My ribs on my left hand side hadn't gone back before I got pregnant again either, they definitely stuck out quite a lot. Goodness knows what they will be like after carrying triplets! 

The pain is quite difficult to describe. It's like having a small object like your knuckle, pushing against your ribs constantly. It goes from a dull ache, like a bruise, to an excruciating pain which makes you want to double over. I find that paracetamol doesn't work so I don't bother taking them at the moment. 

Easing the rib pain 

Stretching. It's taken me 6 weeks to find a way to get breaks in the pain, but I have found a few. The quickest and easiest way to ease it for me at the moment is to recline and put my arms above my head. I have perfected my pile of cushions on the sofa to keep my back straight as allowing my back to hunch aggravates it. Lifting my arms lifts my rib cage away from my massive belly and it feels like they just have a little bit of space to breathe. 

I am at a stage where sitting up is aggravating it now. This is annoying because I need to drive, eat, and socialise. Its such a shame, but I can't really sit on the floor with Jack any more to play, because im too squashed up. Lying back isn't practical. Standing up is now more comfortable than sitting. The other way to ease it is to do some stretches. Put your arms above your head, link your fingers and lean from one side to the other, giving yourself a few seconds on each side. It's only a temporary fix, but it's a good one if you're out and about and don't have access to a sofa. 

Warmth and heat can help a bit. A bath is good, which is combined with the recline and general relaxation time. Hot water bottle and heat bags are good, but I am very careful not to put anything too hot, too close to the babies. My little boys head is right next to my ribs so I am very paranoid about this. Not sure if I should be, but it's easy enough to position it off my belly. 

Lying in bed can be tricky. Lying on my back makes me feel really ill because of the compression on my organs, it also contributes to back and pelvis pain. So which side? Often, lying on my right side, not my rib pain side, actually hurts my ribs more because of the weight of my belly pulling on the ribs. Finding a way to get a pillow correctly positioned is often impossible, so lying on the painful side is sometimes the better of the two. Once I'm settling into a comfortable position, relaxing a bit can help a little too. It's not easy.

*Added tip* My back has flared up, as have my ribs so I have had a couple of massages. My physio advised an ice pack on both my back and ribs. It has really helped my ribs, as unpleasant as it is to do in the middle of winter!

Bra changes?

I have found that bras can be very painful when my ribs are bad. I tend to wear a croptop type thing, or a loose bra. Anything remotely tight is just not worth it at the moment. 

Back pain

Back pain is something I have always suffered from, unless I am doing regular exercise that keeps it strong. During my pregnancy with Jack, I was able to continue Aerial. Not only did it keep me strong and fit, but it was my mental health lifeline. This hasn't been an option this time around, but I have also, so far, been lucky to not be struggling with my back, yet. 

Belly supports seem to be the favourite on the forums I read. They just lift the weight of your belly to take the pressure off your spine and lower back. I use one when I am walking to ease the pressure on my lower belly. They are great for a multitude of things. 

Back strengthening exercises are another easy option. It doesn't have to be anything complicated or strenuous, but if you can keep those muscles strong, the support will hopefully help to keep the pain away, swimming is the obvious gentle excercise which takes the weight off. Yoga and pilates are also fantastic if you have the time and the money. You can find lots of simple excercises online that you can do at home too. Bath, heat and reclining are all good ways to ease the pain too. I also recommend visiting a pregnancy physio. They will be able to advise the best exercises for you and to target the problem area. 

Pelvis pain

This can be very sore in your later weeks of pregnancy, simply because everything is starting to move around in preparation for birth. My current pains are like little twangs which shoot an icy pain accross my pelvis. They are only there very briefly at the moment, usually when I'm walking, turning or twisting. Even straightening up from sitting sends a shooting pain which takes me by surprise. The aches will kick in later for me. 

My advise is yoga. Stretching out your pelvis sounds obvious, but not so obvious how to do it unless you join a class. But not to worry, there are loads of pictures and videos online to give ideas and tips to stretch your pelvis. Same goes for back strengthening exercises and stretches. 

Yoga ball. So many pregnant women spend a huge amount of their third trimester on a big blow up ball. It helps to open up your pelvis simply by the way you sit on it. Rocking backwards, forwards and side to side really helped me. 

I walked loads during my first pregnancy, but my pelvic pain got quite bad in my last 2 weeks. It's finding that happy medium again. 

Restless legs

Uuuuuuuuurgh, it is THE most infuriating thing!!! It started during my second trimester with Jack, and I immediately googled possible causes. Caffeine was high on the list so I switched to decaf tea. I only really drink a couple of brews in the mornings so it wasn't a big deal for me. However, it didn't work. I googled further a found that there is still caffeine in decaff. Annoying, especially considering the title! I also read that chocolate contains caffeine. NOOOOOOOOOOOOO!!!!! I don't have a massively sweet tooth, but I do sometimes like a couple of squares after dinner. Hot chocolate was also a replacement for my brews. It all had to go, but it worked! 

Unfortunately it kicked in around week 8 this time, but at least I knew how to cure it. 

The other thing that is really important to avoid restless legs us excercise. I have done very little during this pregnancy, so when I feel restless legs coming on, I make sure I have a bit of a walk each day, and or do some leg stretches or squats. It genuinely helps to get the blood pumping and prevent the horrible wake up call of restless legs. 

Constipation

It might seem like a pretty obvious pain. But during pregnancy, nothing is obvious, and everything is heightened. I experienced excruciating pain caused by constipation pain a few weeks ago, but it took me a good 12 hours of agony to figure out what on earth was going on. The pains were all the way up both sides of my tummy and it felt like I had pulled all my muscles in one go. I didn't sleep that night and I was on the verge of calling the hospital before I realised I hadn't been to the toilet for a few days, and that maybe it was that causing all these pains accross my whole tummy. It was just before Christmas and I had been aware of all the party food I was eating, but thought I would recognise the signs. Nope! It hit me like a ton of bricks and the pain made me feel sick and exhausted! After a few days of a tailored diet I started to feel a bit more normal, but it took a good week to feel OK again. Needless to say, I am keeping a closer eye on what I eat now. 

These cures and tips are the usual diet tips. Lots of fruit and fiber. There are a few natural sachets you can buy too, and a warm bath eases the pain. But just help yourself and keep the fruit and fiber up. 

Itchy belly

It's inevitable with all of that skin stretching. I started moisturising religiously as soon as I found out about all pregnancies. Morning and evening. When I started growing I started with bio oil or similar once or twice a day. And a standard moisturiser once a day. It's what is always recommended so I've just done it. I didn't get stretch marks with Jack, but some people just don't get them. I don't have any yet either, but they will come soon! 

Because of the oils, I have designated two vest tops to wear underneath my clothes to protect them from the oils. They look really scuffy now so I'm glad I did this because I would be throwing away loads of tops otherwise. 

When the itch starts, keep applying more and more. It does ease it a bit. But the absolute best thing is to jump in the shower and use a really abrasive exfoliating scrub. It is SO satisfying! I use a salt scrub at the moment. You can even make scrubs at home using sugar, salt or oats with various ingredients. I made a lovely orange and sugar one a few years ago. 

I'm adding a little to this as I have found a new tip. I have bought mens XXL t-shirts to wear instead of my (now fitted) maternity tops. Having nothing touching my skin has been AMAZING! I've also moved onto just using oils, no moisturiser at all. This last week has been a dream!!

Finding that happy medium

Right now, I'm 25 weeks and I have stopped work. I am trying to get things organised at home. I am trying to sort out drawers and cupboards, and box up whatever I can to get it out of the way for the next few months and years. It's not particularly strenuous, but it does involve lots of sitting and standing. I am trying to read my aches pains and not let them get too bad before going for a reclined lie down. I then stay reclined for a decent amount of time, until the pains have gone, and I can get up and carry on for a bit longer. 

When in public spaces, I am making the most of seats and benches. I went to the bank today and while she was doing her computer thing, I took advantage and sat for 2 or 3 minutes and it made the world of difference. A small recharge for my journey back to the car (via the pie shop). Take advantage of these small mercies, they help!

I find that lying, sitting or reclining in one position for too long can aggravates other aches and pains. When sitting up was still comfortable, I regularly shifted from upright, to leaning one way or the other to the other to shift the weight from one hip, coxix or other hip. I regularly give up and just go to bed. 

It's all trial and error and different for every pregnancy. Whatever we do, it's probably going to be uncomfortable at some point, or all points. 

Saying all this, I have had a few good days, but today, after a bad nights sleep due to pain in my ribs and back, I have been aching all day. Basically, pregnany can be really bloody hard work, especially when you're in constant pain. So recline, take that bath, and you know what, sod it, go I back to bed!